SERVICE RECORDNO. 0001
Retired & Rebuilt. Body contains aftermarket parts.
You did not retire to rust. You retired to rebuild. The knees click, the shoulder squeaks, and the engine still runs strong.
For the one who fixed everything in the house, got a new knee, and still will not slow down. He laughs first, then wears it every day.
Road-tested by customers
PARTS REPLACED
Which parts are aftermarket?
Tap the parts you have had done.
Tap the parts he has had done.
Start with the capOne size, metal buckle. $29.50, was $35.00.
A tune-upAny 2 pieces ship free. Start with the tee, the cap comes right after.
The full rebuildAny 3 pieces take 15% off. Start with the sweatshirt, then the cap and the tee.
FROM THE REPAIR LOG
They called it Tuesday
The forklift at the shop had a bad bearing. Frank shut it down, wiped his hands on a blue shop rag and got out the wrench. A new bearing cost less than a new forklift. Nobody called it a miracle. They called it Tuesday.
That is the joke on the shirt. A few new parts do not mean the machine is done. It means somebody thought it was worth keeping running.
GIVING IT TO SOMEONE?
For the one with the new knee
- Good for retirement parties, birthdays, Father's Day and Mother's Day.
- The cap is one size with a metal buckle, so there is no size to guess.
- Tee and sweatshirt come in S to 5XL, the jacket in S to 2XL.
- At the door in 5-7 business days in the US.
THE DENIM JACKET
The repair record, on the back
The whole design is printed large across the back, not embroidered: the toolbox, the springs and the joints. The front is plain medium-wash denim with metal buttons and four pockets.
THE PARTS LIST
Four pieces, one design
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No. 1
The Cap
For the garage, the lake and the porch.$29.50
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No. 2
The Tee
For the workbench and the barbecue.$29.50
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No. 3
The Sweatshirt
For early mornings on the lake.$42.50
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No. 4
The Denim jacket
The repair record, printed on the back.$99.00
Good questions
How do the offers work?
Put any 2 pieces in your cart and shipping is free. Put in any 3 and you also get 15% off. It is applied in the cart, no code needed. Other designs count too.
I am buying it as a gift. Which piece is safest?
The cap: it is one size with an adjustable metal buckle that fits 22.8 to 24 inches. For the tee or sweatshirt, tap “Size guide” next to the size box.
Is the jacket design on the front or the back?
On the back, printed large. The front is plain denim with metal buttons and two chest pockets.
When will it arrive?
US delivery takes 5-7 business days. Every piece is printed and shipped from the USA.
What if something is wrong with my order?
You are covered by our 30-day defect and print guarantee. Email cs@oldmanism.com and we will make it right.
For the retirement years.
More from Retired & Relax
Other designs for the retired crowd. Sold separately, and they count toward the same 2- and 3-piece offers.
See the whole collection
The "Lifetime Achievement" Sunset Motel Retro Cap
"Retired! Not My Problem Anymore" Vintage T-Shirt
“Retired. What Day Is It? Doesn’t Matter.” Vintage Sunset Neon Style Cap
"Reel Men Don’t Retire – They Just Fish More" Vintage Cap
"Retired Outlived My 100,000 Mile Warranty" Vintage T-Shirt
"Retired. What Day Is It? Doesn’t Matter" Vintage T-Shirt
“Retired: Time To Wine Down” Vineyard Script Chill Cap
"Retired - Living the 7-Day Weekend - No Alarm Clock Needed" Vintage T-Shirt
"Retired. I Worked My Whole Life for This Shirt" Vintage T-Shirt
"Retired. Full-time CEO of Doing Nothing" Vintage Washed Cap
