{"product_id":"too-old-for-your-bullshit-vintage-sweatshirt","title":"\"Too Old For Your Bullshit\" Vintage Sweatshirt","description":"\u003cp\u003eYou spend enough years being polite, and eventually the filter wears out. This sweatshirt says it before you have to.\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e“Too Old For Your Bullshit” works because it reads less like a joke and more like a posted warning. The sign-style layout, distressed frame, and little caution mark give it that public-notice feel, which makes the line land fast. It suits the guy who has heard enough, explained enough, and no longer feels the need to sugarcoat common sense.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cimg src=\"https:\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0675\/7682\/4041\/files\/6_be5b2460-a0c4-4b14-b3fe-feb5ae7588b5.jpg?v=1785488049\" alt=\"\"\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003cb\u003eWeight That Fits the Message:\u003c\/b\u003e The 50\/50 cotton-poly blend and medium-heavy 8.0 oz fabric give this sweatshirt real substance. It feels right for a line like this because a warning only works when it does not come off thin or flimsy.\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003cb\u003ePrint That Gets Read Quickly:\u003c\/b\u003e The smooth fleece surface helps the stacked front design stay sharp, clear, and easy to catch at a glance. That matters here, because the whole joke depends on reading like a sign people should probably pay attention to.\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003cb\u003eEasy, Unfussy Fit:\u003c\/b\u003e The classic fit and crew neckline make it the kind of sweatshirt you throw on without thinking twice. Good for the man who is past dressing up a mood he already settled years ago.\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003cb\u003eBuilt for Repeat Wear:\u003c\/b\u003e Tubular knit construction and double-needle stitching help it hold up through regular use. That fits the whole attitude of the piece: no drama, no delicacy, just something solid that keeps showing up.\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003cb\u003eKeeps Its Shape:\u003c\/b\u003e Ribbed collar, cuffs, and waistband help everything stay neat without feeling tight. It keeps the sweatshirt looking put together, even when the message is not trying to be.\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003cb\u003eNo Scratchy Extras:\u003c\/b\u003e The tear-away label keeps the inside comfortable all day. Small detail, but exactly the kind of no-fuss practicality this sweatshirt ought to have.\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003cb\u003ePrinted and Shipped from the USA:\u003c\/b\u003e Printed with care and shipped from the USA for dependable quality and a sweatshirt that feels made to be worn, not babied.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cb\u003eGift Fit:\u003c\/b\u003e A strong pick for dads, husbands, grandpas, brothers, or any older guy whose patience has officially left the building. Works for birthdays, Father’s Day, retirement, Christmas, or a just-because gift with a little bite to it.\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eSome messages are better posted than repeated.\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e","brand":"Oldmanism","offers":[{"title":"Forest Green \/ S","offer_id":51576978342121,"sku":null,"price":38.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Forest Green \/ M","offer_id":51576978374889,"sku":null,"price":38.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Forest Green \/ L","offer_id":51576978407657,"sku":null,"price":38.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Forest Green \/ XL","offer_id":51576978440425,"sku":null,"price":38.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Forest Green \/ 2XL","offer_id":51576978473193,"sku":null,"price":39.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Forest Green \/ 3XL","offer_id":51576978505961,"sku":null,"price":40.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Forest Green \/ 4XL","offer_id":51576978538729,"sku":null,"price":41.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Forest Green \/ 5XL","offer_id":51576978571497,"sku":null,"price":42.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ S","offer_id":51576978604265,"sku":null,"price":38.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ M","offer_id":51576978637033,"sku":null,"price":38.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ L","offer_id":51576978669801,"sku":null,"price":38.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ XL","offer_id":51576978702569,"sku":null,"price":38.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 2XL","offer_id":51576978735337,"sku":null,"price":39.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 3XL","offer_id":51576978768105,"sku":null,"price":40.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 4XL","offer_id":51576978800873,"sku":null,"price":41.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 5XL","offer_id":51576978833641,"sku":null,"price":42.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Navy \/ S","offer_id":51576978866409,"sku":null,"price":38.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Navy \/ M","offer_id":51576978899177,"sku":null,"price":38.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Navy \/ L","offer_id":51576978931945,"sku":null,"price":38.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Navy \/ XL","offer_id":51576978964713,"sku":null,"price":38.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Navy \/ 2XL","offer_id":51576978997481,"sku":null,"price":39.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Navy \/ 3XL","offer_id":51576979030249,"sku":null,"price":40.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Navy \/ 4XL","offer_id":51576979063017,"sku":null,"price":41.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Navy \/ 5XL","offer_id":51576979095785,"sku":null,"price":42.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0675\/7682\/4041\/files\/Front_1_45b61f6a-60df-41e5-ac3d-dc525dbe3cec.jpg?v=1785486880","url":"https:\/\/oldmanism.com\/products\/too-old-for-your-bullshit-vintage-sweatshirt","provider":"Oldmanism","version":"1.0","type":"link"}